Throw All Your Turduckens Out NOW!!!

I used to be just like you. I was poor, stupid, ugly, and fat. Now? I’m rich, intelligent, handsome, and JACKED. How? I’ve moved past the oppressive existence of “life” as a TurDucKen-eater. It wasn’t easy, but after eating my fifth TurDucKen in a week, I was getting a stomachache, dealing with severe nutritional deficiencies, and hadn’t been able to go poopy in nearly a month. Something HAD to change. So, I did what no one else had the chutzpah to do: I fought back.

Top Ten Pilgrims I Can Beat in a Fight (And One I Can’t!)

By: Alex Bradford Cobb In this time of reflection and gratitude, it’s important to take the chance to contemplate the important questions in life. Why did Club Penguin close down? Whatever happened to Disco (I can’t even remember it at all!)? And most importantly, which Pilgrims can I beat in a fight? Now, I knowContinue reading “Top Ten Pilgrims I Can Beat in a Fight (And One I Can’t!)”